Called me GRUMPY.... (time to learn)

Is it being Grumpy when you are attempting to process something that you are either a- frustrated, b- annoyed, c- worried about, or d- all of the above?

Lesson being learned today.....

Check your attitude. Even if it is a tough day, week, month, year, check your attitude. Allow yourself time to be upset, annoyed, frustrated, and worried, but try your best to make sure that your reactions don't hurt or affect others in a negative way.

Its not the easiest lesson to learn, especially when you are not ready or willing to learn it.

Coupled with that lesson is the lesson in HONESTY. You (when I say you I mean me) need to be honest with others. When you're mad say you're mad, when you are annoyed admit it and when you're scared be brave enough to say so.

Ok here goes... sometimes situations make me mad, sometimes people annoy me to no end (and its usually those I am closest to) and yup I get scared.... more often then I like to admit.

There you go.... lessons in honesty and dealing with emotion.... man this one may take a little while to grasp onto. This whole being a leader and a learner thing isn't as easy as it looks when you're looking form a distance. Feels like I'm right back in that freshmen year of Bible College being broken into a million pieces and no longer noticing that reflection in the mirror because there is a change going on inside of me. Not one one that I talk a lot about because after all I am an internal thinker.

I think it was said pretty great in "Without A Paddle"--- "It is very confusing to the people in your life when you do not act the way that you are feeling." (Not saying its the best movie in the world but I am saying there's at least one good quote in it.) Acting the way that you are feeling is ok, but allowing the emotion to over take you is NOT!

Wisdom begets Humility

Needed a lesson form those I respect and admire today as I dealt with these questions:

How do you react when the thing you believe in the most next to your belief in God Him self is being publicly attacked? When someone is saying things that are sugar coated and masked to not appear to be belittling that thing that has stolen your heart and passion without you even knowing it what do you say? In a group of people that are supposed to be supportive, loving and compassionate people are backstabbing, giving false information and flat our lying.

What does God honor? God honors the humble. The ones who remember where they came from and who's they are, what they have and who they have it because of. The humble don't spotlight themselves they give credit and honor to others. The humble encourage others and uplift those who are hurting or in need. The humble ask God to continue to mold, shape, teach and guide them. The humble are honest, they keep their word and the promises they have made. The humble do not point out the fact that they are humble and most often hate it when others point out the amazing things they have done or the great things they are attempting to accomplish.

I am honored to be associated with some pretty humble and amazing people. Sure they have their flaws but one thing I truly appreciate about these people is they are willing to admit their faults and their wrongs. Another is that they are quick to say they are sorry when they have hurt someone.

So my prayer today..... God help me to become more like the people I respect and admire because they truly emulate Jesus!

12 is the Magic Number...

Exactly 12 year ago today (well yesterday now) my life completely changed. I held in my hands the most amazingly beautiful thing I had ever seen in my entire life. This pleasant pink coloring with a hint of blue gem like qualities, all the parts in the right places and everything it needed to make it picture perfect. Who knew that tiny little thing would rock my world? On this day, August 20th exactly 12 years ago, my mini me (baby sis) was brought into the world.

Little did I know this kid would cause me to rethink the way I wanted to live my life or do things. Who knew I would want to become a better per

son simply because of one person. So tiny and yet so full of impact on my life. My mini me became an inspiration for me with a simple breath and a glance. Those sparkley blue eyes that looked like sea glass melted my heart. Her simple existence caused me to want to be who God had for me to be... whatever it was I wanted to be that because I wanted to be a good example for her.

So God, 12 years later... help me continue to be someone she can look to and say... I want to be like her because she follows what God has for her. And God, thanks for letting me be a part of her life and even more amazing her a part of mine! What an honor!

Train Track Heartbeat

It wasn't a "requirement" it wasn't something that I "needed to do" it was something that made my heart beat a little different.... something I HAD TO DO! But why would I willingly get up at 6 am after an extremely long couple of days and go to a train station with 4 other people to give FREE breakfast bars to people I don't know????

Part of the answer came at the train station as I watch peoples faces change from the thursday morning slump to the wow someone cared enough to hand me something to make my day better mode. We handed 4 nutria grain bars to a family.. 2 little girls and their parents... unsure of why we were handing them breakfast bars they took them and walked away. Later on we saw them from across the track platform and the father said "this is a great thing you are doing." (that was a nice pat on the back for us)

People's faces and reactions were without a doubt worth it but something even more AMAZING happened when we left the train station. We went and had breakfast (and while that was great it wasn't the amazing part). Our waitress was a riot... at first I am pretty sure she was just annoyed with us b/c we were not ready to order and slightly obnoxious by the end of breakfast things were different. Todd, the master of words and getting people to feel comfortable asked Natalia what she thought he did for a living. She guest a counselor, then said he couldn't be gay b/c he was married, and then guest a stripper (pretty sure that was just to be funny). Then we handed her a Servolution invite card and she got it, Pastor! She also said, "you're probably a pretty cool pastor!" (I guess-- lol)

We got to show people the real love of a "christian" today. Instead of hiding the love that we so often tuck so deep in our hearts lets let it shine....

"This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine

This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine,

let it shine, let it shine, let it shine.

Hide it under a bushel? NO! I'm gonna let it shine,

let it shine let it shine let it shine!"

Today the train tracks caused my heart to beat a little different, it was something I HAD TO DO!!! And now, I'm glad I did! Who needs sleep when you get to show people that they are loved?!?!? What a great opportunity! I am convinced, Serving is the gateway to an amazing day and life in general!

515 days Later

The last 515 days life has been nothing but "different" to say the least. A year and a half of change, nothing, nothing at all is the same, even down to the silly little things. I don't live in the same place, I don't drive the same car, I don't eat the same foods, I don't hang out with the same people. Live is totally different. The biggest changes have happened in my heart. My passion, love and desires have increased and developed. I have learned that no matter what I do or think it is entirely possible that a year from now things will be different. I never thought I would love being home in new york quiet as much as I do. I realized that work could be so fun and fulfilling. And I never expected to love kids I have never even met. As my life changes I realize I could not have picked a better place to want to be. Although every day is not perfect and there are bumps (once in a while creators) in the road 99.999999% of the time there is no where else I would rather be.

And the changes just keep coming... Tomorrow we start the new phase of Point Kids. Change is good. Yes without a doubt change is good. It'll be our first day in THEATER 3, s theater JUST FOR the kids and we're introducing Tots&2s. Tomorrow is going to be an exciting day. I cannot wait to set up THEATER 3 for the first time ever so that it will be used to influence the next generation for the kingdom. What a great opportunity, what an amazing experience. I CANNOT WAIT!!!