10 things how bout 10 million

So I was thinking about the movie 10 Things I Hate About You... not because Heath Ledger was AWESOME (that's true too) but because I was feeling pretty girly.

I can relate A LOT to Kat... not just because of her name but her and I are a lot alike. She was so guarded and afraid to let someone in. See I've been pretty honest here on my blog but in all reality I'm pretty locked... I don't really let people get super close, not right away anyway and if I feel a threat like you might hurt me I like Kat pull away. Sometimes I even push people away. It's not intentional I just don't want to be hurt. See Kat and I are a lot alike we both seem to have it together and we both seem to be self-confident but the truth is both of us are a little fuzzy on some things and we lack that confidence more then we like to admit. And we both want to feel that love but are afraid it will hurt so we close off so that it wont hurt... and instead potentially miss out on things. Not just in a "romantic" relationship sort of way but in general people were only allowed "this far" and NO MORE!

I'd like to say I'm going to change over night and let people in but honestly its a work in progress.... so tonight... I'm praying God helps bring me peace so that I am willing to open up more and allow people into my life in even greater ways.