A funny thing happens when you are sick... you are given a lot of extra time to think. I had to have my gallbladder removed so I have been given a ton of extra time to think.
Today as I was reading through some emails and doing some thinking I realized... although it has cost a lot more then I had ever imagined it would... I could not imagine being ANYWHERE else in the world. I no longer just work a job and attend a church... I have this awesome opportunity to be a part of a church. Part of a plan to make an impact on a community. Part of a group of people who want to show love to lost and hurting people. I gave up my life as I knew it... independant, full of amazing friends to hang out with all the time, and so many other things. My life was going pretty well and I was content but the surrender brought about an amazing change a change I could have never imagined.... PASSION. I had lived 25 years of life with very little passion and now I have slowly tapped back into the passion I kept bottled up because of fear. If I showed the passion I had would risk people laughing or saying I couldn't do it. Few things in life have fired me up and caused me to want to give my all. Even sick all I want to do is whatever I can for this thing that I have become so excited to be a part of. I flashed back to a moment on a missions trip where I told a pastor that all I ever wanted to do was make a difference on God's behalf in this crazy messed up world. That was ten years ago and I repeated my pretty much exact quote today to the pastor of the GREATEST CHURCH I have ever attended. "If all I ever do at the Point for the rest of my life is scrub toilets then that's what I will do, I'm in for the long run." (granted some of the wording may have been a little different- except for the toilet thing) Although I miss some of the things that once filled my life I am so glad to be a part of the amazingness that is the Point!
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