I'm not PERFECT but HE is...

Does a lack of communication mean a lack of care/ concern for ones well being?

Does shutting down because you've been hurt mean you no longer love?

Does feeling abandoned make you bi-polar?

Does wanting chocolate mean you're without a doubt PMSing?

Does being a girl mean I HAVE to wear pink, talk about boys and twirl my hair?

I don't think any of those things are proven to be absolutely true. Sometimes though the way some one acts or reacts causes others to shift what is actually true. Sometimes people react to hurt by doing things completely out of character. Sometimes they act out in fear because if someone actually knew what they were thinking or feeling they might think less of them. Sometimes chocolate just tastes good... no that's not true... chocolate always tastes good, but sometimes you just "have to" have it. I'm pretty sure that not all girls do all the girliest things in the world, at least I hope so, otherwise there's a whole other mystery going on up in here.

What I'm trying to say and I may not be getting it out there as clear as I would like it to be is... misconceptions, misunderstandings, miscommunications and misdirection are all mis-wack but they happen, and they happen, despite seemingly popular belief to EVERYONE. Even the people who others think should be "better then that" go through all of that, just as often if not more because people expect certain things.

I am becoming increasingly more aware of the fact that I am NOT in anyway shape or for perfect or even close to it... shocking I KNOW...ha. I know its lame but that Simple Plan song "Perfect" keeps playing over and over in my head lately... (did a children's pastor just say Simple Plan... yes, yes I did).... you know the song I'm talking about...

'Cause we lost it all
Nothin' lasts forever
I'm sorry I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late
And we can't go back
I'm sorry I can't be perfect

Why that song? Because of the last line in the chorus I just posted... "I'm sorry I can't be perfect" There's so much pressure in the world to be perfect, to do things a certain way and to not deviate from the plan. People forget to let you breathe a little and give you the room to make mistakes. No matter who you are you deserve the opportunity to fail. And not it that, wow you're a screw up no one cares about you sort of way, but in the way where you're human, and you are without a doubt going to make mistakes.

Crazy dumb rant I'm having here but... it's just something that's be circling in my mind the last few days. Especially this time of year I begin to think about all that I've done wrong and how messed up my life is at times, and then how messed up it was or could have been and I start to be come so incredibly thankful for the true reason for this season. I start to think about that little baby who was born in a stable for my imperfect self. I start to think about how his parents looked at him that first night and probably thought... and we're going to have to be willing to say "it's ok" to the plan God has laid out for his life. And suddenly my worry about being as perfect as possible seems to matter wayyyyy less and I realize that if I was perfect I wouldn't need a savior.

I'm so thankful that the SAVIOR came for my imperfect self and that He sees my imperfection and still LOVES me and not only does He love me but He's got a plan for my life.